Terrible mommy moment

Sometimes I feel like the worst mom on the planet. Most of the time, it's because I did something, or didn't do something, that most moms wouldn't blink an eye at doing. Today, it's the flu shot.

I've never gotten a flu shot. Most people I know who've gotten the shot get the flu anyway. Plus, I'm relatively healthy, so what's the big deal, right?

Sophia gets a flu shot every year. I was told that Ryan couldn't get one until he was at least 6 months old, which meant he wasn't getting one this flu season and my husband and I had to get one to help protect our little guy.

Well, we never got one, so of course, I got the flu.

It started last week with some aches and pains, chills and a fever. I ignored it. On Wednesday, Ryan was sent home from daycare with a fever. By Thursday, he and I were both so sick that I made doctor's appointments for both of us.

If you've ever gotten a flu test, you know that it's reason enough to get a flu shot. If you haven't, I'll tell you that the doctor sticks this tube up your nose and rubs your sinuses to collect mucus and then tests it for influenza.

It hurts like nothing I've ever felt before. It's a sharp pain that makes your eyes water and your nose run and bleed.

My test came back positive, which, according to Ryan's pediatrician, likely means my little guy has the flu too.

Ryan has done pretty much nothing but sleep, cry and sometimes eat for the last three days. I feel terrible about it. I'm taking Tamiflu, which helps me get over the flu faster, but there isn't anything we can give him. Only time and Tylenol to help with the fever.

I am sick. Really sick, like I haven't been for a very long time. And I feel terribly guilty knowing that all this suffering could have been prevented with one simple trip to the doctor for a flu shot that I didn't have time for.