It's playtime ... finally

Over the last couple of weeks an amazing thing has been happening in the Hoffman house, my kids have begun playing together.

It only happens once in a while and only for brief amounts of time, but it does happen and I have never been happier. For some reason, Ryan finds Sophia hysterical, and it is absolutely adorable. She will get in his face and crack him up with some kind of nonsensical noise. It is so adorable that I want to cry when I watch them.

When Ryan starts laughing, Sophia takes that as a cue to keep going and they will just look at each other and make noises and laugh for up to 5 minutes. At that point, Ryan gets a little over stimulated and I need to step in and give him a little space. I know their play time will slowly increase as Ryan gets older.

There are many days I wish I had my kids a little more than 14 months apart. When I found out I was pregnant with Ryan, I cried. It was not expected and not immediately a joyous occasion. I was terrified of having them so close.

However, during my pregnancy, I met a lot of women who had children very close in age. It turned out to be more common than I first realized. Every single woman I met told me that at first it was going to be very hard, but as they got older it would get easier. And they were all right.

I am now thrilled that my children are close in age. My daughter simply loves her little brother. She has been anxiously waiting for him to react positively to her for four long months and now that it's happening, she is even more in love. You can see it in her eyes, and slowly that same excitement is brewing in Ryan's eyes.

It is wonderful to see them want to play with each other. I can't think of anything better.

Good morning!

I'm obsessed with sleep. I'm always talking about it and every night I can't wait to do it. And after last night, it looks like I may be able to stop obsessing.

We woke this morning, like every morning, to the cry of a baby, but this morning it was Sophia and this morning it was 7:30.

Last night, Ryan slept through the whole night. When we woke up and realized that neither of us got up with him, our first instinct was to make sure he was OK, but our survival instincts kicked in and we thought better than to go into his room and potentially wake him.

That lasted 15 minutes before the urge to make sure our son was still breathing became overwhelming. At 7:45 a.m., my husband tip-toed into Ryan's room and found our little boy awake and smiling. He must have slept well.

In my experience, that first full night of sleep is stressful in the morning. Instead of waking up feeling well-rested, I wake up and feel anxiety.

Sophia first slept through the night when she was one month old, and since then, with the occasional exception, she has always been a good sleeper. But even now, if we wake up before her, we have to channel all our willpower to not run into her room and check on her.

I don't want to jinx it, but I'm hoping that last night wasn't a fluke and that tonight, tomorrow night and every night after, Ryan and his big sister sleep soundly through the night. It will help everyone feel better, but it won't stop us from worrying about our kids -- I know that will never happen.

One step closer

It’s felt like a million years to get here, but it’s only been four months. This weekend, Ryan rolled over for the first time.

The thrill that came over me when we watch him roll from his belly to his back is indescribable. I am so excited that he has finally hit this milestone, but I am even more excited that he is that much closer to complete mobility. When Ryan can move around on his own he will be able to defend himself against the towering toddler … his big sister.

Sophia absolutely loves her little brother, but she can be a bit aggressive when it comes to showing him how much she loves him. Somehow sticking her face directly in front of his and squealing doesn’t translate real well into “I love you, Ryan.”

When he can move, he will be able to get away from her when she becomes overwhelming. He’ll be able to push her away when she becomes overbearing and he can tackle her to get her back for all the times she’s tried to pick him up by his neck.

Now that he has rolled over, he is one step closer to being able to play with his big sister the way she understands how to play with children her own age. And that means a little more freedom for me.

Thank goodness.

Today was a good day

Relief washed over me when I heard the news. When my husband came home from taking Ryan to the doctor’s this morning, he told me that Ryan is doing 100 percent better than yesterday. I guess the virus is taking its course and the therapy we’ve been doing is working.

Ryan’s breathing was less labored today than it has been in several days. He is still congested and coughing, but that will take some time to clear. The good news is that he can breathe and we don’t have to worry. He’s going to be fine.

Of course, we knew he was going to be fine from the beginning. It’s just hard to keep remembering it while your child is hooked up to machines that monitor his vital signs.
After what we’ve been through during the last several days, today, we wanted to do nothing but hang out together.

And today was a good day.

Today we took the time to enjoy our family. We played, ate and napped together. We stayed in our pajamas all day and just had fun. It was a nice change of pace for all of us. On most days we are running around like crazy trying to keep a schedule and get things done that have to be done. Today we stopped and didn’t do anything we had to do, because the only thing we had to do was be thankful we were all together.